Hi, I have been a Parent Support Adviser now for a little over 10 years, working with Abbotswood Junior School and a number of other Totton schools. This follows 10 years of working with parents and teenagers as a Pupil Support Manager in a secondary school in Lymington.
My days are varied - it is a privilege to work with parents and support them through a number of challenges that being a parent brings!
I am available to work with parent through a number of issues including establishing routines, managing challenging behaviour, stress reducing tips for bedtimes and the often frantic mornings! Attendance may be an issue we can look at the causes and come up with plans together to reduce the stress that this can cause. At times we can find ourselves thrown into a family crisis and it is helpful to talk through how to best manage the impact that this might have on our children with someone who is calm, non-judgmental and can often see the bigger picture and help find ways to keep family life running as smoothly as possible during these times.
Sometimes we just get caught up with busy lives and feel a lack of free time affects how we feel about being a parent - putting ourselves under unnecessary pressure and feeling that we are not achieving our goals is so common and can lead to us feeling frustrated and exhausted. Finding ways to look at things differently and being empowered to make small changes can make a big difference.
Feeling confident and happy with our parenting is what we desire the most. We can often feel judged by how we manage our children, particularly when out and about in public, but we are all in the same boat and it is likely that we have all felt overly critical of ourselves at some stage too.
I have helped many parents complete a number of different referrals, including CAMHS referrals, these can be stressful but a little support is all that is needed. Supporting parents who have children with additional needs can also be needed and helping them make adjustments to general parenting can be beneficial.
Screen time and technology can be both a blessing and be the cause of much disruption in the home, getting advice and setting boundaries might be all that is needed.
Basically, parenting can be the most rewarding experience but raising children comes with a lot of pressure at times - having a few tips up your sleeve might just be useful. J
Very often we are stuck in a groove! Step back and look at the regular patterns of behaviour that happen frequently ……….. you know how the routine plays out! So what needs to change? How do you break the cycle? First identify your part in the ‘pantomime’! Change how you commonly react to situations - say less! Step back and change your tone, don’t get drawn into the argument. When voices or tempers are raised, it’s your cue to go calmer - be clear and firm and as un-emotional as you can. Once you have practised this a few times, it will get easier and you will be more confident to defuse challenging situations. – GOOD LUCK!
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